Hope is a small word that packs a huge punch. Hope plays a larger role in my life than I have been aware of.

For the past couple of weeks I have found myself to be easily frustrated, quick to be unedited in my words, and easily discouraged. This is not a fun place to sit in or experience. As I have thought about it, hope, or a lack of hope, seems to be at the root of my issues.

I have found that hope is a catalyst to standing firm when all else fails and falls away. Hope can keep one from falling away.

Proverbs states, “hope deferred makes the heart sick.” It really does. When we put hope on hold discouragement is not far off. When I stop hoping in something I have placed pressure on myself to make something happen. I have definitely failed at most things when choosing this mentality.

Job states it so well as he wrestles with his own stubbornness, “Why do I put myself in jeoprady and take my life in my hands?”

So many things are rooted in hope: joy, strength, endurance, and perseverance. Hebrews describes “faith is being sure of what I hope for and certain of what I do not see.” My faith has everything to do with how I hope. And my lack of faith has everything to do with how I choose to rely on what is seen.

Paul talks about hope being attributed to the development of character in the time of experienced suffering.

Hope takes me out of myself and fixes my eyes on the one greater then myself; the one who promises plans for me. Hope gives breath and strength to your dreams and desires. Hope builds character, faith, and dependence on God. Hope is powerful.

Paul also states, “for in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? ²⁵But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.”

I have not been waiting patiently in my hope. I have grown in discouragement and frustration. I desire to fix my hope on him.It is time to hope again.

Take one million….and action…

So much truth and enlightening moments can come from kids. It is so humbling to be reminded of what value and character really looks like from a person still missing his front teeth.

Today my co-worker told me a great story about her six-year-old son, named Junior. Now Junior comes and hangs out with us at our office at least one day a week. I must admit, he might be one of my top five favorite kids.

Last night Juniors mom had parent teacher conferences at his school. His teacher raved about his abilities in class, but she could not wait to talk about his awesome personality.

Teacher: Junior is a very people person kinda kid. All the other kids enjoy playing with him. The other day she watched a child approach Junior and ask if he would play with him. Junior nicely declined because he said that he told another boy the day before the he would play with him today. Not only that, but Junior then invited the boy to be a part of what they were going to do.

AWESOME!!! A little man of his word. Talk about value. Junior showed me a great example of character. How often do we say we are going to do something and either dismiss it, as it is a new day, or just find something else to that we think is better? How often do we really mean what we say? How often do we follow through on what we say? How often can I say that I am as reliable as Junior?

Junior is six! He reminded me of the great value of commitment. Not only that, but the value of being inviting and valuing others as well. I want to be a person of good character. Sometimes I cringe at commitment. No matter what, I want to hold true to my word.

Junior not only showed good character, but enabled community as well.

How are you doing on your commitments and word?

Have you invited anyone to anything lately?

This week we have talked about different roles in which the weight influence can be seen and heard. We have looked at how the weight of influence should be valued from your closest relationship to the many you know and don’t know. What about in your house? What about those roles that impact a younger generation?

There is a great verse in Deuteronomy that states, “¹⁸ Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. ¹⁹ Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. ²⁰ Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”

For the past two weeks I have been attending a seminar on parenting that a mentor of mine has been teaching. Personally, I am very far from the role of parent, but her great tools still apply to me as a mentor and counselor. As I was sitting there listening to my friend, I realized that no matter what tools you have, tools are just tools. Tools have no value without strong character behind them. Younger people are great at seeing through what is being said and hone in on what is being done.

Jesus repeatedly stated that, “¹⁹Jesus gave them this answer: “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself; he can do only what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does. ²⁰For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, to your amazement he will show him even greater things than these.”

Who we are matters. What we say and do matters. Rules and tools can only go so far; the weight is in who you are.

Africa has a saying that, “it takes a village to raise a child.” I have had mentors, Young Life leaders, teachers, and youth pastors who have helped raise me along side my parents. Their words and actions have all influenced my life for good and for bad. There is a weight in both.  I can honestly say I have always followed after the actions of those older than me. I can’t tell you one tool they used, but I can tell you what I heard and saw.

Jesus, in his simple words, followed after the what the father said and did. The weight of his influence flowed out of  just that. I hope to say those same words to those around me.

The weight of influence is often attributed to people in the public eye or those who desire to be out front. It is easy to attribute influence to those who volunteer to stand in that position. What I have learned is that everyone carries the weight of influence.

Proverbs 27:6 states, “Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.”

Our closest relationships carry the most influence. There are so many verses in the Bible that talk about the importance of the weight of intimacy we carry with one another. Throughout the New Testament you can find verses that state, “spur one another on,” “pray for one another,” “lay down your life for one another,” and “love one another deeply.” Our heaviest weight of influence is most effective in our closest relationships.

I am often reminded of this whenever I read the stories about the calling of the first disciples. In this story, Jesus is being followed by two disciples of John the Baptist. When confronted with awkward questions, Jesus invites these two men to “come and see” for themselves what he’s about. A couple of verses later, Phillip uses the same words to invite his brother to “come and see” who he knows.

Friends talk alike. Close friends, I am convinced, even look alike. People have accused me and my closest friends of being identical. That speaks to the intimacy of our relationship. I am so thankful for my closest friends. I know and feel the weight of who I am with them. We influence one another. With your closest, you are fighting for them, on your knees for them, believe in them the most, talk like them, laugh like them, are intimately known by them, and the most raw you with them. This is no small thing.

We are responsible to one another. Back in high school our influence was labeled as “peer pressure.” Unfortunately, peer pressure is not out grown as we get older. The hope is that our influence shifts form pressure to bringing out the best version of another.

“Wounds from a friend can be trusted.” That is a powerful statement that deserves reverential fear. We influence others—the stranger, the crowd, and the people who know our innermost being. This is no small thing.

Pray this week for how you influence your friends as well as how your closest influence you. Your closest deserve the best you.

Leadership is a gift that is recognized, in both the Christian and secular world, as the position that has influence. There are recognized requirements for people who are in positions of leadership. We want leaders to be better, more equipped, have greater knowledge, and hold more courage then people who are not leaders.

The Bible talks about greater requirements for those who desire to be in leadership roles. Deacons, overseers, and elders were held to what seemed to be a greater standard. Their lives were being looked at and studied more than others.

There is a verse in Luke that states, “From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.”

Two weeks ago I went to a leadership conference in Atlanta called Catalyst. An amazing conference with an amazing line up of leaders. Each speaker was known for something they’d said, written, or done. I sat with 13,000 people who desired to be different. For two days I absorbed an obscene amount of information about how to lead others. One question I found myself asking over and over was, “what about the small things?” In all reality 5% of the people in that room will go on to experience the kind of leadership success of those on stage. But what about everyone else?

Every speaker that stood on that stage carried the weight of influence. Hundreds of notes were scribbled down on paper. Forty-five minutes on stage, but 13,000 different directions those words were taken when the conference ended. There is a weight required.

There is a holy reverential fear that should be felt when entrusted with much or little. I asked a well known pastor once what advice would he give a person like me with big dreams. He said, “be good with the small things.” I have not forgotten those words. The weight of our influence starts with the small things. The small things are your four person Bible study, the person next to you in your cubical, the stranger who still has no name, your family, friends, and what or whomever is given to you. Our consideration and reverential fear of the weight of our influence should be the same with one person or with one million people.

Jesus was conscious of his weight of influence, and considered that influence equally important, with himself, his closest three, his twelve, and with his thousands. We are asked to do the same.

How are you with your small things?

This idea of carrying the weight of influence scares me. If I was being most honest, it scares me to think that my life, words, actions, silence, beliefs, and values affect others. I do not take the fact that I am in influential positions lightly. I choose my words carefully. I pray over the ears and hearts that might hear these words.

I currently work in private practice as an individual and an adolescent and family counselor.  I feel the weight of influence that my clients are looking to me to have in their lives. From the teenager who still has no idea why they are meeting with me, to the recently divorced man who is searching for some hope. I am who they are sitting with. I am the objective, the compassionate voice, the voice of reason, friend, hope, the one who points to the healer. This is no small thing. For the teenager sitting on my couch, I am the parent, the one who is fighting for them, the encourager, the example that no matter how deep pain goes there is hope and an answer. What I say matters in that office. What I do and say outside of that office matters.

Aside from counseling, my greatest desire is to speak and teach about the word of God. My hearts feels heavy just thinking about the weight of influence that desire holds for me. The weight of that influence represents truth, hope, living as one believes and knows someone greater than myself. My life is meant to magnify the one I want to speak about.

Blogging is a way of speaking. There is a weight I feel when posting. I am methodical about what I write, even if it’s light-hearted. I desire to influence those who read. I do not take blogging lightly. I do not take you reading this lightly.

Everything I say and do should reflect the answer to the question Jesus asks of who I say he is. Before I can be a counselor and a speaker,  I have to just be a follower after him. Before I can play those roles, I must walk out the identity I claim in him. If I had no job, I would still be responsible and accountable to claim Jesus as the Christ. There is still a weight of influence to those who you don’t know are watching and listening. There is a weight of influence to yourself. I know I have to be what I want to say.

I do not take my words lightly. I want to be good for others. I desire to speak truth, provide truth and hope. I crave the weight of my influence to point people to someone greater than me. Even the ones I don’t know are listening and watching.

In Matthew 16, Jesus has a crucial conversation with his disciples. He asks them, “ who do others say that I am?” But the real question is asked of his disciples, “Who do you say that I am?” Jesus asks us this very same question. How we answer this question should change every thing about our lives, how we live, speak, think, perceive, love, know joy and peace, and how we view forgiveness and grace.

It is easy to talk about who the world thinks Jesus is . There is really no personal accountability to how the people around us answer who God is. Their answer is not reflective of who we are. But answering the question posed to us changes everything. However you answer the question of who you say Jesus is, then there becomes a personal responsibility to reflect that answer.

My answer is the same as Peter’s, “you are the Christ (messiah), the son of the living God.” My whole life should reflect this. Jesus also stated that a “tree will be recognized by it’s fruit. Because I claim to answer Jesus’ question to me as messiah. I want my life to show the fruit of that answer. My influence should weigh the same.

Everyone has influence. Leaders are often given the responsibility and accountability to their influence. They are the one’s leading others, so it sounds like a no brain-er to attribute influence to them. No leader or person should take their place of influence lightly. Everyone is asked to be influential for making God known. Everyone should take the weight of their influence very seriously.

We look at doctors and hope they know what they are talking about. We take the weight of their words seriously. We listen to our president hoping that he is acting in our best interest. At church, we listen to our pastors believing they know God; we believe they are doing what they are asking others to do.

Every person has the weight of influence. Every person, from the teacher in the classroom, the counselor, business employee, parent, pastor, friend, spouse, and others a like have a weight of influence. This week I want to break down some of those examples and talk more about what the weight of influence really means.

In light of my current lazy weekend of watching football, I love listening for analogies. I love sports. There are so many truths that come from half time speeches, and good announcers. The funny thing is how they don’t even realize how much truth they are actually speaking.

I love watching football and getting into a close good game. There is something so intense about a good game. I like to yell as if they can hear just me in there head. Today seems to be the day of “hearing footsteps.” This is a term used when someone is about to catch a perfectly thrown ball, but in one split second the fear of being painfully hit takes their eye off the ball. Drop! The unified “OOOOH’s” from all over the stadium, as well as in my house, can be heard in stereo.

I think about the story of Peter walking on water. The man had Jesus in his sight. He was so bold as to ask Jesus to call him out on to the water. Peter was WALKING ON WATER!! In the midst of walking towards his Savior, he heard the footsteps of the wind, the waves, and the reality of where he was. Peter started sinking in fear.

How many times do I hear the footsteps of the world around me and I sink in fear. Even when I pray for Jesus to move me, I still hear the footsteps of logic, when I crave the life and voice of the illogical.

My footsteps look like fear of rejection, looking stupid, not being enough, relying on my own strength, independence, and self-sufficiency. Footsteps look different for everyone, but everyone hears the footsteps at one time or another.

One encouragement about dropping the ball is that there is soon to be another chance to catch it!

Are you hearing footsteps?

I was reading the story of Abraham and Isaac tonight. This is a fairly popular story that illustrates Abraham’s obedience to lay down his most valued asset in his life to God.

This time reading the story, I have really seen the value of the sacrifice. I have always read the story with the question of whether or not I would or could make the same decision.

I have spent time thinking today about how much agonizing pain, prayer, and thought that Abraham experienced on his way up the mountain. The pleads that must have been the scream of his heart. I forget that within all the pain, wrestling, pleading, tears, and anger…Abraham was still walking towards what God had asked of him. He was still obeying while wrestling.

Sacrifices are so hard. I guess it wouldn’t be considered a sacrifice if something were easy to lay down right? Some times I just feel the choice of sacrifice more times then others. Sometimes I wrestle hard and feel every step in my spiritual act of worship more then others.

Sacrifice can look like many different things. A sacrifice can come in the form of a thing such as: house, car, clothes, money, and other tangible things. Sacrifices can look like people and relationships. Sacrifices can also look like things harder to put your finger on. These ambiguous things look like status, success, or finding our worth, pride, self-sufficiency, and independence.

The bible talks about sacrifices being those things we value that might take the place where God should be. A sacrifice could look like your broken and contrite heart. God just wants you. He wants your best (first fruits). He wants to be what is most valued and most sought after in you and me.

I struggle with sacrifice. I am self-sufficient, independant, and pride filled. I am not excited about these character traits in me, but dang does he have to prior my grip off of these things. I feel some heavy days when I choose sacrifice over my own desires. This is where faith comes in that God is sufficient and he is far better then what I think is more valuable.

Jesus showed his love by sacrificing himself. I find it hard to sacrifice or give up my pride, what the heck! He laid down his life. I want to be like that. I want to lay down my life for others.

There are just some days I am conscious of my act of worship more than others.

Grr’s, Buttons, and Pet Peeves….

There are things that make my blood boil, furrow my eye brows, squint my eyes, want to throw something, and just plain toss out a great air punch.

The list goes something like this:

- Other driver s who drive on their own agenda’s at the expense of everyone else

- Mornings (I can hear the amen from my old roommates and friends who know me)

- When people wear sunglasses inside (what is that about?)

- Crafts (never gonna see me scrap booking, but cups up if paper is your thing)

- When people are not being treated well, especially my friends. That BUGS me!

- Scary movies – forget it!

- Fake People

- Chirpy voices

- Courtesy laughs

- Watching others experience pain

- Puking (I will do anything not to puke!)

- Being late

- FINAL – throat bubbles! You know when people clearly need to swallow, but keep on talking through that thing that contorts their voice. Oh Heck no! Makes me air punch and want to crawl out of my skin.

Things that spoil my heart….

These are things that make me smile big, want to hug a stranger, jump around, yell out YESSS!, turn up the music loud, and exhale.

- Hugs, touch, affection…mmmm… love me some lovin

- Chai with soy from Starbucks with icing covering mini scones

- Great convo’s, preferably late at night

- Traveling

- Taking pics of stairs, roads to no where, clouds, lighting, well…anything

- Refreshing moments

- Justice

- Aha! moments

- Extreme adventures – skydiving, bungee jumping, hiking 14′ers, finding anything with adrenaline

- Journaling out my heart with some great music on

- Public speaking (yes I know this is the number one fear/phobia for 90% of people)

- Bend over type laughing to silence

- Watching people get lost in music

- Car singing

- Dreaming

- Listening to another tell their story

- Being in my element and watching others experience theirs.

- Outdoor movies and BBQ’s

- Celebrating others

- Good character

- Dancing til I can’t dance no more!

What are your Grr’s, buttons, and pet peeves?

What spoils your heart?